presense

I just returned home from a wonderful camping trip with much of my family including my brothers, sister, nieces, nephew, grandfather, and Mandy. I really enjoyed the trip but I also noticed the usual different personalities of the people coming out in negative ways.

This was a great experience for me because i realized that I am much less attached to reacting from these negative situations. I can not say that I did not react at all. Just the fact that I noticed them is a small reaction, but even more so I did have feelings inside and a few verbal reactions.

However, my reactions have diminished greatly, also my ability to just notice and not judge has increased greatly.

I believe that this is a result of several things. One is my constant pursuit of studying how to better myself and become more aware, and one is definitely my work at the Hoffman Institute, and lastly one has to be God strengthening me as I work and grow.

On the same lines, just a different twist, I went bowling with several people tonight. I went, and watched due to my finger being fractured last week. I "people watched" and talked with my friends.

Upon going home I realized that my blackberry did not get any attention at the bowling alley. I thought about this and realized that I was more present than I normally am by checking email and craigslist and texting on the cell phone.

I was not 100% present as I was watching others there and thinking about my superficial judgments of them.

Anyway I am excited as presence grows in my life and I become more aware of the now and less judgmental of it.